I have never been the type of person that chooses interaction with marketing types over a decade long stay in a Turkish prison. I know I’ve only met a small subset of these people, but they have been very consistent in their lack of personality and infection with Greased-Pig syndrome. Nothing says more about sales people than their ability to take me for lunch and have me fighting back a retch before ordering. Maybe I’ve seen enough of “Of course it does that” mentality just after explicitly stating that “No, it doesn’t do that”. All that said, here is a marketing example that I can truely get on board with.

What is Marketing?

–You see a gorgeous girl at a party. You go up to her and say, “I’m fantastic in bed.” That’s Direct Marketing.
–You’re at a party with a bunch of friends and see a gorgeous girl. One of your friends goes up to her and pointing at you says, “He’s fantastic in bed.” That’s Advertising.
–You see a gorgeous girl at a party. You go up to her and get her telephone number. The next day you call and say,” Hi, I’m fantastic in bed.” that’s Telemarketing.
–You’re at a party and see a handsome man. You get up and straighten your dress. You walk up to him and pour him a drink. You say, “May I,” And reach up to straighten his tie brushing your breast lightly against his arm, and then say, “By the way, I’m fantastic in bed.” That’s Public Relations.
–You’re at a party and see a gorgeous girl. She walks up to you and says, “I hear you’re fantastic in bed.” That’s Brand Recognition.
–You’re at a party and see a gorgeous girl. You talk her into going home with your friend. That’s a Sales Rep.
–Your friend can’t satisfy her so he calls you. That’s Technical Service.
–You’re on your way to a party when you realize that there could be gorgeous women in all the houses you’re passing. So you climb onto the roof of one situated in the middle and shout at the top of your voice, “I’m fantastic in bed!”. That’s Spam.
–You hear about women like this but never meet one. That’s False Advertising.